I enter the chambers to the right of the Countess’s, and find myself in awe at the beauty of the large bedroom.
I set my things inside my new room, and walk around it, running my fingers on the soft fabric of my bed, the dark wood of the trunk for my things, and the cool brass of my washing pitcher and bowl. The room is grander and far prettier than I thought it would.
I think back to my and Papa’s little cottage in Dorset where I shared the room with him, and lay on a cot of cotton fabric and straw, though I always insisted Papa sleep in it, and I in the hay on the floor. I remember the winters, with the chilling wind coming in from the coast, sweeping through our tiny house and chilling us to the bone, and how difficult it was to strike fire with the wood we found, and how me and Papa often huddled together by the fireplace, tossing in hay. And I remember the springtime I wore pantaloons to help Papa take in the crop, and how Summer came and we could rest for a while. But mostly I remember the winters…the terrible, cold winters.
I shook the thought away and found myself holding my shoulders as though the cold took me, again.
After the War of the Roses, poor papa found himself quite out of work, though he had been a high ranking Captain in the Yorkist Army. When his side lost the war, he could not find work in the Lancaster army, and was soon forgotten, even though his former majesty, Henry VII, ascended the throne and combined the two houses. He could only really find work as a winemaker, and laborer, and though he and mama married, they still had not much money to even care for me, or my elder brother and sister...
I am safer here, I think to myself. Here I can be alone and earn my wages to send back to Papa, and I will have plenty of food and new dresses.
I think of my poor Papa, and how his cough was getting better when I left. And Papa will have more food now that I am gone, and he will only have to look after himself, I think to myself. And I will send him more than half my wages, and send him things for Christmas, I smile.
And maybe, perhaps, I will meet some gentleman who will love me and free me from Papa’s fate.
I smile and go to the bowl and pitcher to wash my face and hands. I fix my ragged dress as best I can, and leave my new room, to venture about the palace grounds.