Music room

She spoke so positive and full of happiness I didn't want to tell her that I was already married, but I knew I had to.
I sat up and stroked her head "Catherine, there's something I need to tell you." I sighed and looked at her face. " I don't think we could get married, reason being is because im already married." I held her hands " But im in love with you and you and this child mean so much to me"

At this news I froze, still feeling his touch, though my mind was racing. I felt utterly deceived, and I knew I'd been a fool. "All this time, you lied?" I sat up and looked at him, my head still in a spin over what he'd admitted. It lessened the blow only a little that he loved me. "Do you not love your wife anymore? If you have no feeling left for her I shan't think it is a marriage at all," I said, feeling I was grasping for straws.

No, no, I never lied I mean you never asked." I said trying to pull her back to me. "I have fallen in deep and utter love for you. This time that we have spent together, I do not regret for you have brought me alive again. My sprit is no longer in drowning for life. Please understand my wife is my wife although, I have no real love for her." I said as wrapped my arms around her waist and kissed her neck.

"Yes, perhaps I did not think to ask, but I assumed that when you looked at me, and touched me, and kissed me, that I was the only woman in the world. That is how you make me feel, Henry." His warmth against me and his kisses made me sigh. "I am so glad I have made you alive again, for you have made me blossom like a rose without thorns." I brought my voice to a whisper, though of course no one would hear us. "Perhaps, when it is only us, we shall call each other husband and wife in private." There was still the issue of his real wife, but to be quite honest, I could only think out of sight, out of mind.

"I don't know what I do if I was to ever lose you my sweet Catherine" I said regretting telling her about my wife but I knew it had to be done.
When she asked me to call her wife, i threw caution to the wind and smiled at her "Of course, but only in private. My wife" i kissed her wishing she really was my wife.

"Oh, I hope we never have to find out," I said dreamily. "You are my world, Henry. What we have is strong, yet very fragile." I soaked up the last moments I had with him, knowing we both had other duties to attend. "But I have you here, in my heart." I kissed his fingers and put them to my chest where my heartbeat was.

I felt her heart beat, then leaned my head on her stomach waiting to see if I could hear the child. "You have life inside you my love, another beating heart lives within the walls of your body." I said amazed at the sounds I was hearing.

I am seated at the bench, staring down at the black and white keys of the virginals before me. Though my fingertips gently kiss them. I have not yet begun playing, as my mind drifts from this place, unable to strike a single note whilst my thoughts are occupied with Catherine. She is already tardy for her lesson, and the rumours swirling about, concerning her and the dowager duchess' new employee Francis Dereham, fill me with much vexation. I await her entrance as I must know if 'tis true... already I sense my temper rising, my mind racing with illicit thoughts of the two of together... My fingers tense~and all at once~push down hard on the keys, creating somber cacophony just as the door opens and Catherine enters. I raise my hands from the keyboard and look up at her sternly.

"You are late for the lesson...do you tarry merely to anger me, Catherine?" I say with controlled rage. "...or because it no longer matters to you?...because I no longer matter to YOU!"

I entered the music room, already filled with sunlight slanting in through the windows, but my smile vanished as I heard the harsh dissonance of the keys upon the virginals. I stopped in my tracks as I looked at Henry. Hearing his angry accusations towards me, I flinched when he shouted. In the silence that followed I felt my heart pounding within the walls of my chest. "I was late because I forgot about the time. You matter to me more than anything on this earth," I said in a soothing voice, trying to calm him. I slowly walked towards him, smiling a little. "Please, do not be angry Henry," I whispered.

My chest heaving, my face hot and ruddy, I stand there and watch as Catherine approaches...a part of me wishes to take her at that moment in my arms... caress her... losing all ill thoughts and evil notions in her warm kiss... yet I cannot slay the dragon within, coiled and poised to strike out, until I've heard from her own lips that which my heart yearns to hear above all; That all my worries are merely gossip-mongering whispered by those bored young ladies in their bedchambers.

"'Tis not merely the lateness that troubles me, Catherine...'tis also the titter-tatter bandied about that there are feelings between you and that churl, Dereham" I reach out, my fingertips lightly brushing the golden tresses falling about her slender shoulders. "...'Tis it or 'tis it not true?" I look her squarely in her clear azure eyes, wide with uncertainty. "...I must know now Catherine, 'tis it true?"

I looked him square in the eyes, my heart rate increasing with each passing second. "The truth of it is, I have never been with Francis Dereham as I have with you. Whatever feelings are supposedly between us, have been conjured by idle brains and idle tongues." I came closer to him so there was little space between us. "You should not let your mind be clouded with doubt."

"I see..." I say and back away, turning toward the Spinet virginals standing there upon it's four legs before us. The ornate lid is raised open, displaying the garishly painted hunting scene in full view on it's underside... Contrasting black and white keys beckon willing fingertips to reach out to them... touch and strike them... as I approach it, I turn back to Catherine and extend my hand toward the cushioned bench.

"Come then and play for me, Catherine... you've had sufficient lesson" I say with a hint of cruelty. "I now wish to hear for myself the dulcet fruits of my labour" I hold my hand straight out, inviting her with a wave of my fingers. "...come, Catherine" I say softly before raising my voice."...COME HERE THIS INSTANT!"

The silence was so unnerving, and I flinched once more as he shouted. My feet refused to move at first, but I held my head high and with my heart pounding so loudly I could hear it in my ears, I went to the virginals and sat down. My fingers rested lightly upon the keys and I gently pressed, hearing a soft sweet chord. "What do you wish me to play?" I asked, keeping my eyes straight ahead.

Standing close directly behind Catherine so that she may hear my voice, feel my presence, yet may not see me... I think for a moment before giving my answer; "I believe we have studied Mouton's Salve Mater Salvatoris, have we not?... as a matter of fact I do recall you performed it with considerable skill... play it for me now Catherine, my dear".. I await to hear the doleful strains of the instrument fill the air, but instead hear only silence... feeling the anger once again twisting within me, I look down to see her attempting to glance up at me. Calmly, I lower my lips slowly to Catherine's ear.

"Is something the matter?..." I whisper, still Catherine does not utter a word. I peek around to her face and see a slight tremor in her pink, pouting bottom lip... "'tis a piece you know well my dear... go on, play it"

I remembered the piece, I had had trouble with it in the beginning but I became better with practice. I had even played for the duchess once. I took a deep breath but my fingers seemed to freeze just above the keys. I felt Henry at the back of me, contemplating my every move. "I cannot think when you are hovering over me, Master Manox!" I said in a hushed whisper, pretending to be irritated with him.

"As you wish" I hush into Catherine's ear, brushing my lips against her soft lobe earlobe as I do. Circling the instrument and it's mistress slowly, silently as a cat, I pause before her and look down upon Catherine's face. Her cheeks blushing as a rose in full bloom.

"Better?... Now go on...play". I watch as Catherine's slender fingers gently kiss each key, filling the air with the swirling, mournful strains of the somber piece. I close my eyes as the music fills my senses and begin walking back around toward her...kneeling beside her, I open my eyes and see her's darting up from the keyboard to me and back.

"Exquisite... pure heaven my dear...what can Master Dereham offer you in return for your affections?... can he give you a gift as pure as the gift of musical proficiency I have bestowed upon you? " I see her falter momentarily. "No... keep playing Catherine" hesitating, she resumes her playing and again I am enraptured by it's intoxicating sound. I reach up and stroke her warm cheek with the back of my hand.

"You play sweetly, my dear... you have learned well". My fingertip moves to touch her full, pink lips. "...Yes, you are quite the apt pupil, Catherine".

I did not like this piece as well as others Henry taught me, but I concentrated with every fiber of my being, wanting to play perfectly for him. Too religious and morose for my taste, I pretended to play out of love for the piece. He mentioned Francis and I wished my heart to still in my chest. "Mister Dereham is a friend only. I don't know why you listen to such idle gossip and choose not to believe me." I could find nothing more to say to him and kept playing as he asked.

As Catherine continues playing I can clearly see the disdain on her face for the piece... precisely why I chose it. Rising and moving behind her, I press my body against hers, my arousal quite evident, and begin stroking her long, silken gold hair...my hands move slowly down her slender, delicate neck and around to caress her slim shoulders...

"Catherine... dear sweet kitty... you've no idea the lengths I would go to... the depths of human depravity I would sink beneath to keep you as mine". My fingertips trace a line down her smooth bare arms. I can hear her playing becoming erratic, faster and corrupted with false notes. I begin breathing heavy, the front of my body rubbing hard against her back. Tendrils of pleasure reach out from below to touch every part of me.

"O Catherine... O Catherine yes!" at last my hands move inward to her collar, gliding slowly down to her modest bosom...savoring the feel as they yield to my fingertips.

My concentration broke several times, as much as I tried to keep my focus on the notes. Henry's words elicited uneasiness in me. "You're scaring me," I whispered as I faltered on a string of notes, mirroring the interruptions of my innocence. His touch was no longer loving, but possessive. I felt his hand reach into my gown and cup my breast, I felt sick to my stomach.

As I lean in to kiss her neck, Catherine suddenly grabs my hand and tears it away. Jumping up as I reach out and grab her wrist, preventing her from leaving, she turns and protests. "Catherine, wait!... " I look desperately at her. "Can't you see I orchestrated all of this because I was insane with jealousy?... I can see the fear on her face and realize I had gone too far... As she cries out and pulls her wrist from my clutch, I watch her run off and suddenly feel racked with pain... the pain of a fool realizing he has lost the last shred of affection still remaining in his possession...as I watch her leave, I fall slowly to my knees and let my head drop into my open hands. "What have I done?" I whisper to myself in growing anguish. "What have I... done".